The Power of Positive Mindset

June 25, 2015


I recently saw this life advice from Oscar-winning screenwriter Diablo Cody and it really struck home:

“Walk into every room like you own the damn place.

 What I love about the quote is that it’s powerful on two levels.

First, it’s the choice to take action on its surface. Walking into a room with utter confidence is an amazing feeling. In the story, Cody discussed the aftermath of a college break up, and how she walked back into the coffeeshop where they met – knowing he could be there – with her head held high.

Second, it shows the power of a positive mindset. Directly after her breakup, Cody felt lousy. She felt like she had been rejected by a better-looking specimen. She describes him as, “completely out of my league, looks-wise. At the time, there was this Versace campaign that was splashed everywhere, and people actually thought he was the guy. That’s how hot he was.”

A conversation with her father inspired Cody to shift her thinking and cope differently with the hurt of being dumped. Instead of focusing on the negative, she actively chose to feel empowered.

That’s one of the cool things about mindset – it’s a choice. To be honest, it’s not an easy choice for women in today’s media environment. The message are stacked against us – oftentimes deliberately, in an effort to inspire consumer behavior.

At some point, all women go through a stage of feeling blah in the realm of mind, body or spirit. Maybe we didn’t hit our goals in business, or the number on the scale isn’t what we want it to be or we’ve been dumped by a Versace-level hottie. In those moments, it’s hard to remember that mindset is a decision – yet that’s the exact first step to getting out of a negative mindset.

The minute we reconnect with mindset as a decision we have the power to control, we can start to think proactively about shifting our thoughts. Once our thoughts change, we can take one small action toward something different. When Diablo Cody decided to go back to the coffeehouse, she picked something she controlled 100% – the choice to take herself to that location.

Then, having made a decision and taken action, it becomes easier to shift the biggest piece – the feelings about ourselves.

Decision. Action. Worthiness. These are the three steps to a positive mindset.

We’re all on a constantly evolving mindset journey, so if you’d like to shift from feeling blah to feeling bliss, pick one thing you’d like to shift and practice those three steps:

  • Decide to shift your thinking about one aspect of your life.
  • Pick one small action step that’s completely within your control, and take it.
  • Choose to feel positively about the forward progress.

Rinse and repeat.

  1. Linda Crawford Thursday - 25 / 06 / 2015 Reply
    Being dumped by a man , for a younger women, is definitely one of those events that can give you the blahs! Diablo Cody is gorgeous! I don't doubt she OWNED the coffeehouse when she walked in! I have recently been in a state of the blahs myself, and the longer you stay there, the harder it is to make that decision to change your mindset. One day, I couldn't stand myself anymore, so I went on a cleaning spree. Wow, what a difference that made! My clean house made me feel so much happier and in control. I see how these 3 steps can make such a difference, so will continue to step forward. I wish my house would stay clean so I don't have to keep repeating that one!
  2. Florenda Tuesday - 30 / 06 / 2015 Reply
    Thanks Ali - great stuff that helps us grow and achieve! Cheers Florenda

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SHE BUZZ is the place to go to tune into the world of women. From news stories and trends to the issues women uniquely face in the world by virtue of being women. It may be fun and festive, or sad and serious. This column will be guided by current events and personal opinion – all on the topic of women’s experiences.
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ALI CUDBY teaches a proven method to transform the customer culture for businesses that sell to women. With Ali, businesses lay a strong foundation for building the deep relationships customers crave as the antidote to isolation in the modern economy.
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Ali is a bestselling author and has been featured in TV, print and online for publications such as Cosmopolitan and Essence Magazine, among others. She holds an MBA from Wharton Business School and spends her spare time in her pottery studio.


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